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Puppy 1

Monday Puppy!
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: Mondays, Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 08:16 AM

Here’s your Monday puppy! Enjoy!

Puppy 1

RE: Monday Puppy!
From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 08:17 AM

Hey Terence,

Would you mind taking me off the puppy email list?

Thanks,
John

Monday Puppy, Part Doggy Deux
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: Mondays, Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 09:23 AM

How about a second Monday puppy because today’s so RUFF?

Puppy 2

RE: Monday Puppy, Part Doggy Deux

From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 09:23 AM

Terence,

I don’t mean to be a party pooper, but I don’t want to receive any more puppy emails.

John

This Day Is Waggin’ By
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: Mondays, Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 11:49 AM

Bow wow, today is moving slow! So guess what? You get three Monday puppies for the price of one!

Puppy 3
RE: This Day Is Waggin’ By
From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 11:49 AM

Terence,

I can see that you opened my previous email. Please stop sending me puppies. I find it highly annoying.

Under Where?
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: John Seiler
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 11:51 AM

Looks like this boxer is wearing briefs!

Puppy 4

RE: Under Where?
From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 11:51 AM

Are you kidding me? You sent this to me only.

Help
From: John Seiler
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 11:54 AM

Hey everyone,

Can you take me off this group? Terence refuses to acknowledge my emails or even answer his phone.

RE: Help
From: John Seiler
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 01:29 PM

Anybody?

Throw Him A Bone!
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 01:31 PM

John’s making this puppy sad.

Puppy 5
RE: Throw Him A Bone!
From: John Seiler
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 02:13 PM

Seriously? Nobody can take me off this group or even respond?

RE: Throw Him A Bone!
From: Cathy Armand
To: John Seiler
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 02:16 PM

John, it’s just puppy photos. Please, I beg you, just go with it. It’s just part of life here at TD Ameritrade.

Cathy Armand

Harrassing Emails
From: John Seiler
To: Human Resources
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 03:34 PM

Hello,

This is John Seiler in Small Business Finances. I have been receiving cute puppy emials from Terence O’Reilly, which I do not care to receive anymore. When I addressed this wih him, he keeps sending me more puppy emails. Can you speak to him?

Thank you,

John Seiler

RE: Harrassing Emails
From: Phil Peppers
To: John Seiler
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 04:10 PM

Hi John,

Are you sure you have the right name? I don’t have a record of a Terence O’Reilly working here. Can you forward me one of the emails?

Phil

I Gots To Buries My Bones
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: John Seiler
Sent: Monday, April 21st, 2014 04:11 PM

Some puppies shouldn’t go digging!

Puppy 6

Phil Peppers
From: Corporate Offices
To: TD AMERITRADE ALL
Sent: Tuesday, Aprill 22nd, 2014 07:29 AM

Please join us in mourning the loss of Human Resources Manager, Phil Peppers. If you have any information that you believe is relevant to the case, police are asking that you contact them immediately.

Heather Constance,
VP, North American Offices

RE: Phil Peppers
From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Tuesday, Aprill 22nd, 2014 08:29 AM

What did you do?

Let’s All Paws For Phil
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Tuesday, Aprill 22nd, 2014 09:14 AM

Phil’s with the angels now.

Puppy 7

Please Help
From: John Seiler
To: Human Resources
Sent: Tuesday, April 22nd, 2014 10:01 AM

Hello,

This is John Seiler. I was speaking to Phil Peppers before he passed about some emails from Terence O’Reilly. Do you have any information on him at all? I can’t even find his desk here.

Thanks,

John Seiler

RE: Please Help
From: Millie Sanders
To: John Seiler
Sent: Tuesday, April 22nd, 2014 10:59 AM

John,

I couldn’t find anything at first, but I found some old files. Terence O’Reilly died in 1999. He was killed by a pack of wild dogs.

Millie Sanders

Window Repairs
From: Heather Constance
To: TD AMERITRADE ALL
Sent: Wednesday, April 23rd, 2014 03:29 PM

We’re reminding everyone in the Nashville office that window repair will be going on today in Millie Sanders former office, after she mysteriously fell to her death. Again, the police are looking for any assistance.

I wonder if this guy will crack the case?

Puppy 8

Bad Puppy
From: Terence O’Reilly
To: John Seiler
Sent: Thursday, May 29th, 2014 03:42 PM

Do you see now?

RE: Bad Puppy
From: John Seiler
To: Terence O’Reilly
Sent: Wednesday, April 23rd, 2014 03:43 PM

Yes. Yes, I see.

Monday Got You Licked?
From: John Seiler
To: Mondays Am I Right? Group
Sent: Monday, April 28th, 2014 08:16 AM

Uh-oh, this golfing doggy’s in the RUFF! Happy Monday!

Puppy 10

Warren Arnold is a freelance writer and contributor to the trivia game, You Don’t Know Jack. He has a silly humor blog at brainforthought.wordpress.com and you can follow him on Twitter via @warreng76. He would hug you if you could.

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