A donkey is special, a donkey is pure, a donkey’s not snooty about fresh laid manure. A donkey is noble, a donkey is proud. A donkey discovered Jesus Christ’s shroud. A donkey’s a burro in Mexico City, where La Cucaracha is his favorite ditty. It’s said that young donkeys have magical powers, and if they were unhappy, there’d never be flowers! Be nice to donkeys, or else, as they say, you’ll live to regret it, one cold, bloody day.


A rabbit is lucky! A rabbit is fun!  A rabbit’s efficient and gets all his chores done! A rabbit is silly, a rabbit can hop! But be good, little children! Some rabbits are cops! They’ll be quick to arrest you and send you to jail. Do your parents love you enough to post bail?

Ah yes, the kitten. Friend to the witch. He leads young children by night to a ditch. The kitten will spook you with yellow green eyes. The first child who meets them’s the first child who dies
. Bawk says the chicken as she welcomes the day. Bawk bawk says the chicken, blithe, bonny and gay. Bawk says the chicken as she enters her crate. Naught says the chicken as she lies on your plate.  Don’t be fooled by her silence, as you nibble your toast. Sometimes your dinner comes back as a ghost.

   Warm in your bed, all safe and snuggly, your teddy protects you from all that is ugly. Monsters be gone! Don’t you come near! For my brave little teddy bear is guarding me here. But hush, little children, don’t be caught unaware. Your sweet little teddy, still is a bear. He’ll chomp on your skin. He’ll nibble your arm. He’ll drink up your blood, all ruby and warm. Night night, now, children. Go off to sleep. But be wary of the company that you choose to keep.

Julia Weiss is a writer, improviser, and actress. Julia has a big heart and a tiny bladder. Julia likes baths and wine. @weiss_tea.

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